Apartheid
we share this Holy earth
our blood is the same blood,
so bleed compassion!
The eyes all dry and swollen from crying,
Pleading for help because the colour kept dying,
Stuck with nothing - no toys, no books,
Nothing to hide in the crannies and nooks,
But to shame on them for whipping them all,
No "coloured" trespassing in a mall,
You'd be tortured and punished,
And then they'd look at you like you're last night's rubbish,
The world heard these cries and pleas,
As the mocked were all being teased,
They tried to run but something stopped them,
Perhaps the guns that were aimed at 'em,
But soon words fought through all the lies,
And the world took note and started to rise,
Stop this cruelty, stop this punishment,
Why are all the blacks all in a tent,
Or homeless with nothing else but a can,
We can put a stop on this right now, we can
And so they did, ending it now,
It is time to go, and time to woe ...
I really enjoyed reading this poem, I think you really captured the pain and suffering in the Apartheid, plus I liked how you made it ryhme and it still made sence.
ReplyDeleteI really think this poem is the complete explanation to the feeling of aparthied. I feel it mashes together perfectly.
ReplyDeleteThe little paragraph before the poem really got me into the mood. What really got me was the line "so bleed compasion" It really stood out because bleeding and compasion are different in alot of ways. Yet they are a perfect fit.
I like the second poem how you almost made it seem like it was one of your nightmare poems and you could feel them crying and weeping and also you could almost think that it could be any type of scene.
ReplyDeleteNice job. I liked how you took your time to rhyme it
ReplyDeleteit really touched my heart and it's a really good poem! it must have taken you a long while! you are really good so keep writing, you'll get far!
ReplyDeleteI liked how it was a diamate.......... I think, but I think you should takek the ! out after you said " so bleed compassion" because it is quite a formal poem.
ReplyDeleteI actually think that the exclamation part should be kept,because it makes it bolder and more clear.(To me,at least)
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